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Living London Page 4
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"Of course, Miss Westin." He pressed his lips together as if he was trying to hold back a smirk.
"I don't believe you, Lord Ashby," I accused jokingly.
"Good," he teased back.
"I'm clumsy? Is that what you're saying?" I asked with a wide smile. Though I knew I shouldn't be happy with his opinion of my dancing skill, it was simply fun to joke a bit.
"No, Miss Westin." He leaned forward, and I found myself mesmerized, not for the first time, by the intense blue of his eyes. "I didn't call you clumsy. You did, after you stepped on my boot for the third time."
"I did not!" I shot back, though I had no idea if I had or hadn't.
"You indeed did," he replied, leaning back in his chair and watching me closely.
I crossed my arms and leaned back into the settee. "You win. I have no idea if I did or did not, but I do know this. I am a wonderful dancer." I tilted my chin and gave him what I hoped was a secretive grin.
He just shrugged his broad shoulders but spoke no response. His eyes taunted me while I struggled to find a witty remark to keep the conversation going. Lord Ashby had put me at ease with his quick wit and charming smile. Though I assumed he wouldn't stay for a lengthy visit, I couldn't help but wish he'd linger at least a while longer. There was so much more I wanted to learn about him, yet I knew that time would be my ally. Assuming I had time, that is.
"Miss Westin, forgive my teasing. It's a pleasure to know that even if you are struggling with remembering your past, you still are remaining true to your nature." His expression went somber, and I waited for him to explain, but he looked down and broke eye contact before rising. "I thank you for seeing me today. I'm relieved to know you're on the mend. I'll take my leave now."
After bowing slightly to me, he stood up then walked away. His posture was perfect and crisp, which accented the muscular lines of his shoulders and back. As I watched him walk away, I was struck by how different he was from the men in my time. There was no swagger, no feminine sway, no sagging pants or slouching. Every line of his back was straight, and the way he held himself displayed the broadness of his shoulders and v-shape of his upper body. His legs, clothed in form fitting pants, were hard with muscle, and I found myself tilting my head as I enjoyed the view. Maybe Regency England wouldn't be so bad after all.
He turned back to me as he reached the parlor door and nodded. Not knowing what to do, I simply stood and managed a silent wave. His form began to disappear into the hall, but he gave me one last look over his shoulder that was undeniably familiar. My belly swirled and tightened with confusing awareness. With a lingering gaze and slight nod, he left. Slowly, I sat back down on the settee and wondered just what parts of my story were missing. How can different pieces fit together when they were made in different eras? And what would happen if all the puzzle pieces began to fit? That question bothered me most of all.
Chapter Five
"I need help," I said to the maid, Libby, as I slipped into my room and closed the door behind me. She was remaking my bed after my earlier efforts. Apparently I didn't know how to do it correctly.
"Oh, miss, you gave me a fright! What can I help you with?"
Looking into her wide blue eyes, I searched for a hint of distain, mistrust, or anything that would make her untrustworthy. She noticed my perusal and seemed hurt. She didn't back down but waited for me to come to a conclusion. She seemed honest, and she didn't have that air of jealousy or selfishness about her some girls had. I'd always been good at reading people. Hopefully it would serve me well here in London.
"I need a crash course in etiquette."
"You need help with manners, miss?" Her expression was disbelieving and dubious, as if unsure whether she should question me or simply obey.
"Yes. I'm sure you're aware I can't remember a thing, and I believe I just made several social—" What was the word? "—faux pas with the Marquess, Morgan Ansley."
Her eyebrows shot up at the mention of his name, and I wondered if she would offer any insight into the intriguing Marquess. "Of course, miss, I'd be happy to instruct you."
I breathed out a huge sigh of relief. "Thank you."
****
"No, miss, that is the marrow spoon."
"The what?" I asked, afraid of the answer.
"Marrow," Libby stated. "As in the middle of a bone."
"I eat that?" I asked, shuddering at the thought. Oh, whatever happened to french fries?
"Of course! It's a delicacy."
"Do I like it?" I felt stupid for asking the question, but I was curious.
"No. You do not." And with that simple answer, Libby's face broke into a grin, and I knew we were destined to be friends.
"Must I eat it when it's offered?"
"Yes, but only a bite or two to be polite. Then you may fill up on whatever you wish."
What a relief. I didn't want to be eating marrow for dinner or lunch or at anytime really. The thought set my stomach on edge. "What's next?" I asked, placing the spoon back where it belonged. Thankfully, Nanna had helped me understand formal place settings, but that spoon had thrown me for a loop. Dinner I could handle, but afterward… that was going to be a different story.
"Well, miss, the gentlemen will retire to a separate salon than the women and enjoy brandy, cigars, and conversation. The women will drink sherry in a sitting room and play piano, converse, and engage in other activities."
I could play piano, so that would be helpful, although the pieces I knew by heart hadn't been written yet. Smiling to myself, I imagined sitting with all those proper British ladies and pounding out "Heart and Soul" on the piano. Tempting.
Libby pulled me from my daydream. "Come, miss, let's practice conversation." Once she'd realized the depth of help necessary to render me capable in polite society, she had thrown herself into the task with gusto. As I stood and walked with her to the sitting room, she began to frown. "May I speak frankly, miss?"
"Always. You don't need my permission. Please just be honest."
"Your posture is horrid." Her mouth pinched as she looked me over, apparently finding my stance severely lacking. Nanna had scolded me many times over my posture when I'd been a child, but I thought I had remedied it. Apparently I was mistaken. How could one slouch in a corset, anyway? If I tried I'd simply fall over.
"Like this. Tuck your belly in, throw your shoulders back, and pinch them. Keep your hands at your side. That's it." She nodded as I followed her instructions.
I felt like I was in a commercial for the US army, standing at attention. I had broad shoulders, so the last thing I wanted to do was accentuate them. As if reading my mind, Libby corrected me.
"Keeping your shoulders back will minimize their broadness, but also remember, your waist is small and the contrast with your shoulders and waist and — lower half — give you the perfect hourglass shape. Use it well, miss." She nodded as I adjusted my body.
She was right. The corset had given me an even smaller waistline, and I could understand her logic. Keeping my posture, I followed her into the green salon.
"Miss, walk quieter. Don't stomp. Glide. Watch me." She moved with a grace that reminded me of ballet. I could do that, but holding the posture and gliding seemed a bit difficult. But if she could do it, so could I. Focusing my efforts I managed to "glide" into the parlor with Libby clapping her hands.
"Now hold your head up high, tilt your head back slightly, and raise your ears."
"My what?"
"Your ears. Pull your spine straight. Ah yes. Very nice."
This was much more work than I'd anticipated. Walking — no, gliding over to the settee while keeping my ears raised, I sat down gently and crossed my legs.
"Oh no, miss! You mustn't do that. " She sat next to me and showed me how to cross my ankles.
Ah, I remember doing that. I'd only gotten in the habit of crossing my legs after high school. Nanna had never allowed me to do it around her, said it was vulgar. Now perfectly posed, I closed my eyes and tried to memorize
the position so I could find it once again.
"Much better! I see you've been busy, Libby!" Mrs. Trimbleton announced as she joined us in the parlor. Her cap was pristine white and her riotous curls were threatening to overcome their pins. She handed me a weighty bundle of missives. I regarded the pile, noticing all the varying designs and shapes.
"What's this?" I asked, wondering if had to write thank you cards for some reason.
"Your correspondence. It seems that news of your incident yesterday has made the rounds. Judging by the amount of invitations you received, the ton is concerned about your welfare. No doubt the Dannberry brothers spread the word at White's last night. Those two couldn't keep a secret if they tried." She blew out an indignant huff as she sifted through the pile of letters. She came to a thick ivory envelope with embossed etching and a blue wax seal. "Ah, here's the one you'll want to attend tonight."
"Wait, all of these are for tonight?"
"Oh, no, not all of them. I'm sure there are one or two that are merely correspondence."
There had to be fifteen envelopes. Apparently my mishap had given me a boost of popularity. Not exactly the kind of popularity I would wish for, but there was nothing I could do about it. "What is the invitation for?" I asked, curious.
"The Steward's Ball. It's a smaller affair, and you go each year. Your cream gown will be beautiful. Libby, would you please set it out and arrange everything for Miss Westin's toilet?"
"Yes'm." She dipped a quick curtsey to Mrs. Trimbleton and then to me and scurried away to do the housekeeper's bidding.
"Do you honestly think I'm ready for this? You saw me this morning. Don't you think my attendance tonight is a bit premature? Surely I'll humiliate myself!
She straightened her spine and pulled herself to her full height of about five-foot-two and speared me with a sharp gaze. "You're a Westin. You do not hide. Ever. You will be grace and beauty. You will have a good excuse to leave early, but you will stay, you will dance, and you will uphold your family's name."
One thing hadn't changed in all the chaos—I was still a Westin. And she was right. If I hid I'd only fuel the gossip, practically begging for the old biddies to slay my family's name. I couldn't let that happen. I'd read enough of my Regency romance books to know what to expect in a general sense, and I knew I had to face the sharks or else I'd end up being bait.
So, with a deep breath, I gazed into Mrs. Trimbleton's eyes. "All right, what do I need to do?"
Chapter Six
A few hours, several hundred pins, and one oxygen-depriving corset later, I was proclaimed ready. I had no chaperone, but I was told I had taken to attending these gatherings alone once I'd reached my majority. I didn't see what the big deal was, but I tried to keep in mind that this was a whole different ball game than anything I was used to. I was Elizabeth Bennet, facing the Caroline Binglys of the ton. I was simply aiming to survive and have a little fun in the process.
"Miss, wait a moment. I haven't finished with your final touches."
"I thought you said I was ready?" I questioned, trying to remain polite though my patience had been spent over an hour ago. But Libby had worked tirelessly over my skin, dress, and hair that whole time without one complaint, so the least I could do was be civil.
"You are, minus the final touches. I'll be right back."
She left the room, and I studied myself in the mirror. My green eyes were accented by the cream color of my dress. With its emerald sash and embellishments, the velvet belt accented the empire waist. The long ends hung clear to the floor. A soft golden silk layer peeked beneath the hem of the cream layer and shimmered in the candlelight.
My honey-blonde hair was piled up onto my head in large, pinned curls. The front was braided then swept back with large crystal pin. Even without any makeup, I was beautiful. If I were given one cosmetic on a deserted island, I would have chosen mascara, but seeing myself with the polished skin and complimentary colors of my gown, I began to wonder why I even wore it in the first place. There was something to be said about natural beauty.
As I paused to take a fortifying breath, I choked because my constricting corset inhibited any amount of airflow larger than a small gasp. Good thing I wasn't claustrophobic. I'd be in a fetal position on the floor.
"Here we are, miss!" Libby exclaimed, causing me to jump a little. She held a delicate, diamond-encrusted tiara that was so thin and small, it looked like a headband. She placed it into my hair and secured it with another twenty pins. Then, moving behind me, she placed a pearl teardrop necklace around my neck. It looked exactly like Nanna's. The one back home, in my time.
"Where did I get this necklace?" I asked, breathlessly.
"It's one of the original family heirlooms. It's not as brilliant as some of the others, but you fancy it. It's been in your family for generations."
And Nanna left it to me. Twice. "Thank you." I felt my eyes tear up, and I forced myself to calm down, not wanting to undo all the primping work we had just finished.
"Here are your slippers, miss." The slippers were made of a golden silk. They didn't do anything to protect my feet, only adorned them, but they were beautiful. "All set. I'll tell Wains to get your carriage ready."
I turned to catch Libby's hand. She gasped at the contact. "Thank you, Libby. You did a wonderful job, and I feel beautiful."
"Of course, miss, a pleasure." She blushed to the roots of her hair, and I wondered if she had ever been thanked before. Taking one last look at myself, I prepared to meet my peers, praying I didn't make a fool of myself twice in one day.
Twilight covered the cobblestone streets in amber light as I made my way to the Steward's residence. London was beautiful, but I'd expected it to smell better, much better. The stench was almost enough to distract from the beauty — almost, but not quite. Taking a deep breath was risky with the executioner's corset and bad air, but my nerves craved any sort of comfort.
Buildings passed in slow motion as we neared our destination. The line to the front entrance was long, and I wondered just how "small" this ball was going to be. The horses all waited patiently as their owners waited for their turns. It reminded me of rush hour traffic, only much politer.
After a twenty-minute wait that didn't help my nerves, I arrived. Taking my driver's hand, I carefully stepped out of the carriage and onto the street, gasping at the amount of people just at the entrance. No, this was not a small gathering. If it was, half of London would be invited to a large one.
Just breathe. My thoughts gave me a smile as I remembered the scene from Ever After. Right now I felt like that kind of Cinderella.
"Your coat, miss?" a footman asked, offering to help me remove my outer jacket. After thanking him, I moved on through the foyer and into a hallway. My jaw slackened at the opulence displayed. Hothouse roses poured over the furniture, set off by millions of candles that seemed to make the roses' scent thicker, more heady. Gilded mirrors hung, shimmering with reflections as I passed, and I could hear the faint song of a string quartet. The whole scene was surreal, beautiful, and distracting enough that I forgot to be nervous.
"Your name, miss?" a liveried footman asked as I entered the ballroom.
I turned his direction for only a second to give him my name, then went back to taking in the glittering display in front of me. I could easily be a wallflower and just find a corner and stare — at the people, the paintings, the decorations, and the grand stature of it all.
The women milled about like walking Grecian statues with their flowing dresses, similar to mine, but all unique. The men mostly wore black suit coats with stiff white collars that looked uncomfortable but really — well, dashing. As my name was announced, the room went still, and the eyes of each person fixed on me.
Never being the one who wanted the spotlight, I tried to hold my head high and pretend it didn't bother me, regardless of how I wanted to run and hide, anywhere. Remembering my crash course with Libby, I pulled up my ears, straightened my back, and smiled, hoping no one notice
d how my mouth trembled. Walking over to a group of older women I decided to try and blend in.
"Miss Westin! How shocking to see you here!" a grandmotherly woman remarked. Her eyes squinted as if she couldn't see very clearly. Her face was made unnaturally white by some sort of powder.
"Yes, well, one can never let mishaps get the best of us," I remarked, hoping it was the right thing to say. Mrs. Trimbleton had given me a few pointers as she'd walked me to the carriage earlier.
"Now, lovey, listen carefully. The ton, they can smell fear. If you're uncertain about your position, they'll pounce quickly. When in doubt, act indifferent. You'll appear uninterested rather than confused. If you pretend you are confident, they'll believe it. And finally, this is the most important. Never, ever find yourself alone with any gentleman, even if he is older than Methuselah himself." She had spoken with strict authority.
I did my best to follow her wise advice. My attention was drawn back as the woman studied me. After a thorough perusal, she nodded her head in approval. "Glad to see the spirit in you. We'll see you soon at Almack's, I expect."
Trying to hide my shock at her implication, I decided to smile and pretend confidence. "Of course!"
Nodding, she turned her attention to another woman, dismissing me. Not wanting to appear rude or needy, I walked away toward a group of young women about my age.
"Miss Westin!" A girl walked up to me quickly, reaching out to grasp my gloved hand. "How are you? We heard about the park and were so concerned."
Her eyes were cold and calculating, watching my every expression as if searching for a weakness to exploit. Fantastic. Just the type of person I wanted to converse with tonight. Girls are girls, no matter what era you live in. Nothing new here. "Thank you for your concern. I seem to be doing much better," I replied, keeping my voice cool.
The girl tilted her head, studying me again before turning to her sidekick. "Elaina, are you sure you heard correctly?" she challenged the girl, right in front of me no less.